Trust can collapse instantly—on almost any level—personal, business, or other relationships. Holly Andraes, writing in the Harvard Business Review said, Trust is the basis for almost everything we do. It’s the foundation on which our laws and contracts are built. It’s the reason we’re willing to exchange our hard-earned paychecks for goods and services, to pledge our lives to another person in marriage, and to cast a ballot for someone who will represent our interests. Trust is the glue that holds civilization together.
We trust that our paycheck deposited in the bank will yield our money when we claim it. We trust that when we fill our gas tank actual gas is flowing in and not buttermilk. We tend to trust the “tried and true.” There is an old Russian proverb, “Trust, but verify.” Russian scholar Suzanne Massie, taught this proverb to President Ronald Regan—who used it enough that it became something of an American watchword. For example, intuitively we use this adage daily related to our traffic laws. We trust that oncoming drivers will keep in their traffic lane–as the distance between our vehicles closes at 80 to 140 mph—but we check—as we maintain situation awareness.
When trust crumbles, or is only threatened, creditability is damaged if not destroyed. Losing trust in an invested relationship is devastating, and restoration could be nearly impossible. In reality, we human beings are flawed; while there is good in everyone of us, it is also true that each of us is imperfect. Our flaws are (or can be) meliorated with kindness, forgiveness, and compassion—and are ways to allow growing a solid relationship. Rebuilding trust takes intentional, intensive work on the part of each party.
Want to Know If Someone Is Trustworthy? Look for These 15 Signs—wrote Wanda Thibodeaux, in an article for INC magazine. Here are a few of my favorites from her list; They are consistent. They compromise and don’t expect something for nothing. They’re right a lot. You know who they’re connected to, and they try to connect you. I believe these points go far in letting your “gut-feeling” guide you to build trust. It takes will. It takes time. It takes attention. But a strong relationship of trust is worth it.
One of my favorite stories of transformation to trust is that of Saul of Tarsus. This man not only hated Christians, but also contrived to imprison or kill them. Following Saul’s dramatic change of heart it took nearly all fifteen of Wanda Thibodeaux’s Trustworthy signs to convince the fledgling home-churches that Saul—Now Paul—was the real deal. Broken trust not only can be restored, it can also become foundational. From the tutelage of an important Jewish lawyer, Gamaliel, and testimony of a Roman Centurion, Paul’ s credibility was established—as well as given powerful influence. In a word, Trust was established.
©Copyright Willis H. Moore 2024