Bill Withers sang…”we all need somebody to lean on…” —which on its face goes counter to American individualism. The old “Can Do” mentality seems to be fed to us with our baby food. But why this dichotomy? Merriam-Webster defines “lean”; to rely for support or inspiration. America’s addiction to sports reveals a conundrum—the can-do spirit woven incongruously into sharing (teamwork). The reality is that we do not live in isolation.
Withers’ opening words: Sometimes in our lives we all have pain. We all have sorrow. But if we are wise we know that there’s always tomorrow. Lean on me when you’re not strong. And I’ll be your friend I’ll help you carry on…For it won’t be long till I’m gonna need somebody to lean on. I have an idea that at least part of our social malaise stems from a mortal vanity.
Over the past year and a half students and general citizenry discovered isolation horrifying if not harmful. We humans are social beings. I think our COVID-19 advice was misdirected; maybe it should not be social distancing, but physical distancing. There is a difference; physical distancing simply keeps one a safe distance from the spread of the virus. Social distance puts a barrier between our spirits. OK. So, maybe I’m splitting hairs; I don’t think so. Subtle nuances in our language can cause something of a fracture in our human interactions. I prefer a nuance that leans toward a more positive posture.
As I was writing this, a friend pointed out that in the outset of COVID-19 most everyone was saying, “We’re all in this together!” then he asked, “What happened to that spirit?” Part of the decline of that spirit, In My Humble Opinion, has to do with the growing corrosive infection of a malignant variant— “Me First.” Some independence is good; even healthy. But at the expense of community, it becomes morally bankrupt. One illustration of this idea gone wrong is this; if we are at sea in the same boat with others, you do not have the moral right to bore a hole in the bottom of the boat to suit yourself.
The Children of Israel felt the Gibeonites were a threat to their community; They were terrified! Their immediate response was to “circle the wagons” and care only for themselves. However Joshua listened; He heard the Gibeonites referring to what Jesus would later teach; Love conquers all. So Joshua cooled the controversy by giving the Gibeonites a place of service in the community. Threat negated!
As COVID-19 rages on, here is one of the most heartfelt, if not graphic indications that “we all need somebody to lean on,” –“I need a Hug!” It has become an often-heard plea. It is a visceral account of how much we all need each other—to lean on. Yes. We are all in this boat together —the boat of community life. Yes! We all need somebody to lean on!
John Donne said it clearly, No man is an island entire of itself; …, a part of any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind. Does it seem odd to you also that we human beings can’t seem to get the hang of Donne’s simple but clear declaration? The good news is that sometimes we get it—especially in a crisis, as in the aftermath of a tornado or hurricane. We should learn from these.
Songwriters Jimmy Robbins, Maddie Marlow, and Taylor Dye got it right in their lyrics, People Need People
People need people when the highs get low
The world’s a bit too heavy for one shoulder to hold
The strongest souls still wear out, and the hardest hearts still break
Sometimes you ain’t alright and sometimes that’s okay…
Somebody to call when you’re too close to the edge
Somebody to catch you when you’re dancing on a ledge
Somebody to pray for you, someone that you can pray for
To need and be needed, oh, I believe it’s what we were made for…
So if you’re asking me
It’s what else this world can be
People need people.
I think the words are what Jesus meant when he called on his followers to put on my yoke when (we) are weary and over-burdened… A yoke by definition is “a wooden bar or frame by which two draft animals (such as oxen) are joined at the heads or necks for working together. The operative word is together.